Self-esteem

Believe in yourself?? I'm....Me???

Well, I think I'm born with it, low self-esteem, perhaps. But again, it depends on how you define it. I'm not the one who often feel like a victim, an outsider, a leftout, etc. Still, I don't have the level of self-esteem that a normal person should have. Peeps call it emo, I think. NO, I'm not emo!! And again, it depends on your definition.

I can't, I couldn't, I shouldn't, I have to...??? Yeaaa, sometimes, I did tell myself, I CAN'T do it.

Perhaps, I'm the one who tend to focus on and magnify my perceived shortcomings, and ignore my strengths as well as achievements. And yet, I know true self esteem values itself, it says, I can do, I can have, I can make my life the way I desire it to be.

One day, I will tell myself, I CAN do it.

Malaysia Festival 2010 - Sydney

Malaysia Festival...MFest....Okay, I've had enough of these words in these few months, and it's not the end yet. There're few more months to go. Wish me luck here.

It would be a long grandma story to explain everything. All I know is --- all of sudden, I involved in this event. Then, I decided not to quit just because of one word -- responsible. It would be very irresponsible to quit when you grabbed others' chances of getting this highly competitive position. I know lotsa people out there running for this post, and I got it unintentionally.

After involving for these few months, I can see that there's a bunch of people, getting themselves involved in troubles; trying hard to promote Malaysian cultural activities, cuisine and performances to the Australian public, university students, tourists as well as Malaysians residing in Sydney. Lotsa effort has been putting in to make the event a success. And me, myself has sacrificed lotsa things throughout the organising process as well. In the very end, I do really hope that everything will go well this year. I know I entered it late, I know I'm new, I know I don't have much experience on this and I know it well that I didn't do a good job due to numerous factors, but I wish I won't screw this up. I don't wish to see the disappointments on those people who have put so much effort in it.

I would really like to extend my heartfelt gratitude to all the EPs for backing me up. I wouldn't survive without you guys. And not to forget those last year's committee, you guys are really helpful though you are no longer involved this year. You guys made me realised that how responsible a person can be.

The last group is ---for sure, they would be, you, you, you and you. You know who you are. The moral support, the heart-to-heart talk, the assistance in calling companies, the assistance in proofreading, the helpfulness in doing my housework, the kindness of cooking for me...etc etc.. I should considered myself as the luckiest one for having you guys by my side.

Anyway, check this out at the official web site http://malaysiafest.com.au/ and the blog page at http://www.malaysiafest.com.au/blog/. They''ll be constantly updated as the month's progress. Click the "like" button on the web page to support our (you, my, their) hard work.

Oh yea, MFest is on facebook, the famous online social networking site as well. http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=13509668087&ref=ts.

Paste's -- "Worth it"

It's 2.26a.m. and I'm still awake. Staring at the Facebook Dilemma's Case Study, a long sigh I give. I'm still doing this work at this moment!!! Okay, I admit, it was my bad. I can't blame anyone nor anything but myself. I just couldn't concentrate on the book, and ended up doing the same work for the whole day.

Again, I was distracted away from the book and started clicking on the keypad.

Pooopppp....This anonymous blog entry came across my screen. I ran through it and felt that his way of describing a girl he likes is so UNIQUE. The girl seems to be unacknowledged of his feelings.

Anyway, the descriptions seem familiar, I've heard it somewhere. Perhaps, I've felt it somewhere. But, this is not the main point. The main point is to share his writing...(:

"She's just a girl".

Or so they say, but I would know better.

She's different. Special.

Never have I met someone so genuine.
Or amazing.
Or intelligent.
Or charming.
Or thoughtful.
Or witty.
Or mature.
Or just simply irresistibly alluring.

Never have I been so smitten or captivated... nor have I fallen so quickly and irrevocably for anyone before.

I have always taken pride in my state of mind and clear reasoning... but this is the closest I've been to succumbing to the irrationality of emotions, or to be more precise, the sudden absence of it.

All the pent-up desires, investment of hopes and possibilities... vanished within the span of a conversation, replaced by the phantoms of 'if only' and 'what ifs'.

I feel hollow. More hollow than I have in years.

But it was worth it.
SHE was worth it; every single ounce of effort, emotion and uncertainty....

Because clearly, she's not just any ordinary girl.

And I pray she knows that.

柴米油盐酱醋茶

2010年王力宏的音乐大件事，就是回归内心的平凡，单纯。

古人所言的，[早晨开门七件事-- 柴米油盐酱醋茶]，生活里不可或缺的烹煮调味料，再普通不过的小东西，却是爱情在轰轰烈烈 、生活征战喧嚣过后，最真实存在的。

这首歌告诉所有人，努力生活 、努力找属于自己的幸福 、努力当个追梦人.....过程中或会有泪水或阻隔，但始终相信，终究每个人都会找到自己的定位。

MV 拍出了每个女人最想要的未来，温馨。

Don't give up please

Don't give up please, promise?

I feel sad to hear those words from you. Life isn't as miserable as you thought. There might be miracles. I know you don't believe in miracles anymore, but I wish you will,one day.

Here is my promise. Regardless of what happen to you in the future, you won't be alone. I'll stay with you. I'll work double hard for you. I know you're worried about your future, but please have my promise in mind, WE won't leave you. Though I can't make sure that jie will do the same, but I will. You have my words!

I'm afraid to call back, cause I know you guys won't tell the truth. For you all, everything is always going well when I ask. I just don't believe it!!

Please don't lose the courage to continue working hard for yourself!!

Regards,

EJ

About-to-break-down-smile!

Some people don't like setting a high expectation, it's because their hearts can't accept huge disappointment like this.

Some people put up a mask so that others won't sense the about-to-break-down smile!!!!!!

1、有些事，我们明知道是错的，也要去坚持，因为不甘心；有些人，我们明知道是爱的，也要去放弃，因为没结局；有时候，我们明知道没路了，却还在前行，因为习惯了。

2、以为蒙上了眼睛，就可以看不见这个世界；以为捂住了耳朵，就可以听不到所有的烦恼；以为脚步停了下来，心就可以不再远行.

3、那些已经犯过的错误，有一些是因为来不及，有一些是因为刻意躲避，更多的时候是茫然地站到了一边。

4、人最大的困难是认识自己，最容易的也是认识自己。很多时候，我们认不清自己，只因为我们把自己放在了一个错误的位置，给了自己一个错觉。所以，不怕前路坎坷，只怕从一开始就走错了方向。

5、如果你明明知道这个故事的结局，你或者选择说出来，或者装作不知道，万不要欲言又止。有时候留给别人的伤害，选择沉默比选择坦白要痛多了。