过客。避免

经历了这么多，事情的真相渐渐浮出了，
很多的虚伪也渐渐的显露出，
当然，我可以选择不想知道，而这也是我一直以来的选择，
现在，看淡一切了，宗教的教导的确实现了许多丑陋的现实，
苏哈诺法师，我很佩服你对世界的预言，对事实的分析；
海涛法师，我很敬佩你对人间的看淡，客观的分析，处理事情的方法；
弟，我终于明白你为何那么喜欢出家的日子，
那种心情的平静就是人们的最终追求，
身为姐的我，觉得有些丢脸；很多时候都是你反过来安慰我，劝我看淡，
我应该向你们学习，学会看淡一切，
也许这才是精彩的人生。

我清楚地知道我只是你们生命中的过客，
也有可能连一个过客都不如，
我的一切都被你们当成事不关己，
你们的喜悦，伤心，烦恼也从不愿意与我分享，
我努力地想了解，安慰，帮忙，都没有得到好的回报，
我永远都会对自己说：终有一天会得到的，默默地付出对自己无损；
有人好奇为何从没看过我生气，
我的回答是：我害怕自己的情绪会让我失去一切，所以，只好压抑了。
然而，你们的忽略都伤透了我的心，
让我成为一个名副其实的陌生人。

现在，我唯一能做的就是保持沉默，把一切当做听不到，看不见，也懒得去关心了。
为了避免良心被当狗吠，
为了避免被认为多管闲事，
为了避免善意的体谅被当成刻意的隐瞒事实，
为了避免更多裂痕的产生（努力地修补裂痕不见得会得到好的结果，因为裂痕好像永远都退不去），
你能做多少就做吧，无能为力的就放下吧，
毕竟人生短短，不该让关心你的人为你担心，而你却为那些从不把你放在心里的人伤心。

Learnt .

Learnt...
Throughout the short life that I've been going through, I've learned lotsa through experiences and from the people in the surroundings regardless i know them or not.
I've been trying hard to learn every single value and message that the life is going to tell me.
I got some, but lost some.

• I've learned to sacrifice certain things when the critical situations come.
• I've learned not to vent my grievances on other things or people.
• I've learned not to complain about the woes anymore(people just don't care and are not interested in knowing you).
• I've learned to merge into others' so called culture.
• I've learned to stay more independently(or perhaps lonely).
• I've learned that sometimes those who seem close to you won't be by your side when you need some shoulders to rest on or some hands to borrow.However, those who look insignificant will appear as the saviors. (don't it sounds ridiculous??So please treat everyone nicely and try to notice every single creature in your surroundings...)
• I've learned that some people can just be so selfish, though you treated them nice.
• I've learned to think positively in most situations (sometimes, the things are not as bad as what you think..=D)
• I've learned to be true to own self (don't suppress your true self).
• I've learned to live life to the fullest.
• I've learned that there are always many kinds of people out there that you've never seen and you would never understand them.
• I've learned to shut the mouth in most situations as you might not know how others will think about your speech( your speech may inadvertently stir up the anger of others!!!So, please learn to watch your words as well. To survive!! The phrase "silent is golden" can be applied here. P.s: Try not to care about others' opinion regard your silence as human are selfish; try to be selfish once for your survival... ).
  

There're still lotsa things that I've learned but these are some that I was able to figure out recently.

A special video--Everything is possible

The value that this video wanna bring to us is quite meaningful. Many people like to say that nothing is impossible, but does this statement true?? To me, perhaps it's not so true, sometimes, we don't have the power to make everything happen in our own favour way. So, this statement can't be true in my point of view. Yet, it's quite true if you digest the words in another way. "If you are determined enough to do something, the impossible can become possible".

So, just try to make everything possible (provided that they are positive thingy..=D). Think positively can make our world more wonderful. "Broken mirror is amendable"(quoted)....:)

Perseverance!!!

Farewell

Another 50-ian left. This time is Arrol. This prince heads to US.

I skipped the friday class and rushed back to attend his farewell and send him at the airport. I feel quite guilty for not accompanying him by staying at the party last night. Wanyen and I left with jinyang for supper with his gang of friends while Arrol stayed at his party to serve his guest.

It was kind pf rush last night. Reached at 10 something at Juru, waiting for sister to fetch me back to her apartment for about 20 minutes. Thanks sis for the willingness to spend ur time and go so far to fetch me. Thanks to ur friend that drove you there and helped me to carry my luggage.

By the time I finished bathing, jinyang reached already.I left my sister house and followed jinyang to Arrol's. Yet, I just stepped into the party for few minutes then went out with jinyang's gang until two something in the morning. That gang is a bit crazy, having mix rice for supper at one somethg...Thanks to those gang of people that tried hard to entertain me, but dont talk about the past rumours please!!It was kind of awkward situation when I found out that all his friends know about the rumour. About two somethg, Arrol fetched us to stay overnight at his aunt's house at batu ferringhi. The room is nice and great. Thanks aunt and Arrol. We slept for 2hours and woke up at four something. Lol, I couldnt imagine I was able to get up so early. Again, Arrol, you should appreciate it. I skipped class and got up early for you...haha..(jk)

In the airport, many of Arrol's friends went to send him. But, we were wondering why his gf didnt turn up. The last few minutes before Arrol left, she came with swollen eyes. She seemed like has been crying for the whole night. I noticed that his mom cried as well, but his brother didnt show any sadness(sweat=='). This scene made me think of the situation of myself leaving next year. Will mom,bro and sis cry? Will I have a bf to cry for me?(ss-ing)....Anyway, I think I will be the one who drop tears first.

I'm afraid of the leaving scene, when Arrol hugged everyone, the scene seemed like implying that he'll never come back. When it's my turn, I gave a kind of weird response,he realised it and asked "Is it so grudging for a hug??"...Lol, it's not, I was just sad to see another friend leaving, and didnt know what kind of response should I give for the goodbye hug.

Hope to see you again. It's sad to see you guys leaving one by one, and I know I may be one of the leaving gang as well. Sigh...

Charity Carnival 09

In holiday now,but I know it well that this is gonna be a hell like week with lotsa assignments,reports,presentations to be completed and tests to be prepared. Before switching into researching+revising mode, I've decided to post somethings here.

I'm now at home,which i've been away for few months. Again,home is always the best, and I've realised this since long ago. If your life away from home is harsh, the urge for home is more serious.I've realised this since long ago as well. That's why some people will never miss home, but some will desperate for home. Ok, there are

Before coming back, I've joined a Charity Carnival organised by college. It's indeed a tiring day. The preparation spent out nite, the carnival spent our day...Anyway, i think everyone enjoys it,though it's a tiring job. All J6's gathered at my unit the night before the carnival and started the preparation.


The next day, some people got up early to cook at casa and some went to taylor for the setting up stall. We have invited a special guest to help us cutting the fruits.....Ms Doh(math lecturer).


Then, the day busy day began. When the day ended, photo taking session began. Of course, class photo with our mentor is a must.


Lastly, I would like to extend my heartfelt gratitude to those who contributed for the charity...
Here is a thanking list:-
Thanks to ms doh for cutting the fruits+donating sweets,
Thanks to ms sharon for the containers+buying sweets for me,
Thanks to Mr A for the satay+his attempt to attract crowd with the oily look,
Thanks to those who woke up early to fry the patty,
Thanks to those who helped out for the preparation the night before,
Thanks to the driver,sellers,chefs,promoters,runners,planners..&buyers...=D

Another wish

I wish...I wish...I could have a shoulder to rest on, for this moment...
I'm just too tired of everything,
desperate for peace, rest, "simple", home...

Fairy oh fairy, will you make my wishes come true?

Ok,now, I wish I could be the fairy, I can realise my own wishes as well as others'.
I can sense the feeling of satisfaction after fulfilling people's wishes, it's full of delightness, contentedness, happiness, joyfulness.....

Me, myself and I

I wish....I wish....I could spend some quality time with me, myself and I.....yet, the reality always turns me down...

Pleasing everyone???

How to please everyone???
How to make life simpler???
Sometimes,she just rather be that one and only bitch and stop these craps than being that goodie angel but prolong it....
After all,it has to come to an end one day, where there will be peace and everyone is pleased!!!
Hope there is a person out there who understands why she has to do this...

Sometimes it's good to be a jerk..
At least can make everything clearer, rather than faking everything...and make everything so...FAKE..
At least, a jerk is true to him/herself and everyone..

But sometimes people don't accept the truth... :(
They will end up firing you with lotsa allegations which are not true...
So,be own self....????

Those that are not true will go away as time passes...????
The TRUTH will always remain???
Will people see it in the end??
So, be own self is the best???

Everyone has their own weaknesses and strengths..
And obviously there are SOME people out there who will not be happy with you in someways.
But you can't blame life.
Life's fair, yet the people who live in it are never fair.